EUELPIDES Straight on do you bid me go, where the tree stands?”
PEISTHETAERUS O hang it all! mine’s croaking back again.
EUELPIDES Why are we wandering up and down, you rogue? This endless spin will make an end of us.
PEISTHETAERUS To think that I, poor fool, at a crow’s bidding, Should trudge about, an hundred miles and more!
EUELPIDES To think that I, poor wretch, at a daw’s bidding, Should wear the very nails from off my feet!
PEISTHETAERUS Why, where we are, I’ve not the least idea.
EUELPIDES Could you from hence find out your fatherland?
PEISTHETAERUS No, that would pose even—Execestides!
EUELPIDES O, here’s a nuisance!
PEISTHETAERUS Go you there, then, friend.
EUELPIDES I call Philocrates a regular cheat, The fool that sells the bird-trays in the market. He swore these two would lead us straight to Tereus, The hoopoe, made a bird in that same market. So then this daw, this son of Tharreleides,
EUELPIDES We bought for an obol, and that crow for three. But what knew they? Nothing, but how to—bite! Where are you gaping now? Do you want to lead us Against the rocks? There’s no road here, I tell you.
PEISTHETAERUS No, nor yet here; not even the tiniest path.
EUELPIDES Well, but what says your crow about the road?
PEISTHETAERUS By Zeus, she croaks quite differently now.
EUELPIDES (Shouting.) WHAT DOES SHE SAY ABOUT THE ROAD?
PEISTHETAERUS She says She’ll gnaw my fingers off: that’s all she says.
EUELPIDES Now isn’t it a shame that when we are here Ready and willing as two men can be To go to the ravens, we can’t find the way. For we are sick, spectators, with a sickness Just the reverse of that which Sacas has. He, no true townsman, would perforce press in; Whilst we, with rights of tribe and race unchallenged, Townsmen mid townsmen, no man scaring us, Spread both our—feet, and flew away from home.— Not that we hate our city, as not being A prosperous mighty city, free for all To spend their wealth in, paying fines and fees.
EUELPIDES Aye, the cicalas chirp upon the boughs One month, or two; but our Athénians chirp Over their lawsuits all their whole life long. That’s why we are journeying on this journey now, Trudging along with basket, pot, and myrtles, To find some quiet easy-going spot, Where we may settle down, and dwell in peace. Tereus, the hoopoe, is our journey’s aim, To learn if he, in any place he has flown to, Has seen the sort of city that we want.
PEISTHETAERUS You there!
EUELPIDES What now?
PEISTHETAERUS My crow keeps croaking upwards Ever so long.
EUELPIDES And here’s my jackdaw gaping Up in the air, as if to show me something. There must be birds about, I am sure of that. Let’s make a noise and we shall soon find out.
PEISTHETAERUS Then harkye; bang your leg against the rock.
EUELPIDES And you, your head; and there’ll be twice the noise.
PEISTHETAERUS Well, take a stone and knock.
EUELPIDES Yes, I’ll do that. Boy! Boy!
PEISTHETAERUS Eh! What! do you call the hoopoe “Boy”? You should call “Whoop-ho there,” not “Boy” of course.
EUELPIDES O, Whoop-ho there! What, must I knock again? Whoop-ho!
SERVANT OF HOOPOE Whoever are these? Who calls my master?
EUELPIDES Apollo shield us, what a terrible gape!
SERVANT OF HOOPOE These be two bird-catchers. O dear, O dear!
EUELPIDES (Aside) As nasty-speaking, as unpleasant-looking!
SERVANT OF HOOPOE Ye shall both die!
EUELPIDES O, we’re not men.
SERVANT OF HOOPOE What then?
EUELPIDES Well, I’m the Panic-struck, a Libyan bird.
SERVANT OF HOOPOE Nonsense!
EUELPIDES No nonsense: look for yourself and see.
SERVANT OF HOOPOE And he—what bird is he? come, won’t you answer?
PEISTHETAERUS I? I’m a pheasant, and a yellow-tailed one.
EUELPIDES But O by all the Gods, whatever are you?
SERVANT OF HOOPOE A serving-bird.
EUELPIDES What, vanquished by some gamecock In fight?
SERVANT OF HOOPOE No, but my master, when he first Became a hoopoe, prayed that I might turn Into a bird, to be his servant still.
EUELPIDES What, does a bird require a serving-bird?
SERVANT OF HOOPOE He does, as having been a man, I fancy. So when he wants to taste Phaleric sardines,
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