STREPSIADES Oh! fool, fool, fool, how mad I must have been To cast away the Gods, for Socrates. Yet Hermes, gracious Hermes, be not angry Nor crush me utterly, but look with mercy On faults to which his idle talk hath led me. And lend thy counsel; tell me, had I better Plague them with lawsuits, or how else annoy them. (Affects to listen.) Good: your advice is good: I’ll have no lawsuits, I’ll go at once and set their house on fire, The prating rascals. Here, here, Xanthias, Quick, quick here, bring your ladder and your pitchfork, Climb to the roof of their vile thinking-house, Dig at their tiles, dig stoutly, an’ thou lovest me. Tumble the very house about their ears. And someone fetch me here a lighted torch, And I’ll soon see if, boasters as they are, They won’t repent of what they’ve done to me.
STUDENT O dear! O dear!
STREPSIADES Now, now, my torch, send out a lusty flame.
STUDENT Man! what are you at there?
STREPSIADES What am I at? I’ll tell you. I’m splitting straws with your house-rafters here.
STUDENT Oh me! who’s been and set our house on fire?
STREPSIADES Who was it, think you, that you stole the cloak from?
STUDENT O Murder! Murder!
STREPSIADES That’s the very thing, Unless this pick prove traitor to my hopes, Or I fall down, and break my blessed neck.
SOCRATES Hallo! what are you at, up on our roof?
STREPSIADES I walk on air, and contemplate the Sun.
SOCRATES O! I shall suffocate. O dear! O dear!
CHAEREPHON And I, poor devil, shall be burnt to death.
STREPSIADES For with what aim did ye insult the Gods, And pry around the dwellings of the Moon? Strike, smite them, spare them not, for many reasons, BUT MOST BECAUSE THEY HAVE BLASPHEMED THE GODS!
CHORUS Lead out of the way: for I think we may say We have acted our part very fairly to-day.
Cite This Text