MAID O lucky People, and O happy me, And O my mistress, luckiest of us all, And ye who now are standing at our door, And all our neighbours, aye and all our town, And I’m a lucky waiting-maid, who now Have had my head with unguents rich and rare Perfumed and bathed; but far surpassing all Are those sweet flagons full of Thasian wine. Their fragrance long keeps lingering in the head, Whilst all the rest evaporate and fade. There’s nothing half so good; great gods, not half! Choose the most fragrant, mix it neat and raw, ’Twill make us merry all the whole night through. But tell me, ladies, where my master is; I mean, the husband of my honoured mistress.
CHORUS If you stay here, methinks you’ll find him soon.
MAID Aye, here he comes. He’s off to join the dinner. O master, O you lucky, lucky man!
BLEPYRUS What I?
MAID Yes you, by Zeus, you luckiest man.
MAID What greater bliss than yours, who, out of more Than thrice ten thousand citizens, alone, Have managed, you alone, to get no dinner?
CHORUS You tell of a happy man, and no mistake.
MAID Hi! Hi! where now?
BLEPYRUS I’m off to join the dinner.
MAID And much the last of all, by Aphrodite. Well, well, my mistress bade me take you, sir, You and these little girls and bring you thither. Aye, and there’s store of Chian wine remaining, And other dainties too; so don’t delay. And all the audience who are well disposed, And every judge who looks not otherwards, Come on with us; we’ll freely give you all.
BLEPYRUS Nay, no exceptions; open wide your mouth, Invite them all in free and generous style, Boy, stripling, grandsire; yea, announce that all Shall find a table all prepared and spread For their enjoyment, in—their own sweet homes. But I! I’ll hurry off to join the feast, And here at least I’ve got a torch all handy.
CHORUS Then why so long keep lingering here, nor take These little ladies down? And as you go, I’ll sing a song, a Lay of Lay-the-dinner. But first, a slight suggestion to the judges. Let the wise and philosophic choose me for my wisdom’s sake, Those who joy in mirth and laughter choose me for the jests I make; Then with hardly an exception every vote I’m bound to win.
CHORUS Let it nothing tell against me, that my play must first begin; See that, through the afterpieces, back to me your memory strays; Keep your oaths, and well and truly judge between the rival plays. Be not like the wanton women, never mindful of the past, Always for the new admirer, always fondest of the last. Now ’tis time, ’tis time, ’tis time, Sisters dear, ’tis time for certain, if we mean the thing to do, To the public feast to hasten. Therefore foot it neatly, you, First throw up your right leg, so, Then the left, and away to go, Cretan measure.
BLEPYRUS Aye, with pleasure.
CHORUS Now must the spindleshanks, lanky and lean, Trip to the banquet, for soon will, I ween, High on the table be smoking a dish Brimming with game and with fowl and with fish, All sorts of good things. Plattero-filleto-mulleto-turboto- -Cranio-morselo-pickleo-acido- -Silphio-honeyo-pouredonthe-topothe- -Ouzelo-throstleo-cushato-culvero- -Cutleto-roastingo-marrowo-dippero- -Leveret-syrupo-gibleto-wings. So now ye have heard these tidings true, Lay hold of a plate and an omelette too, And scurry away at your topmost speed, And so you will have whereon to feed.
BLEPYRUS They’re guzzling already, I know, I know.
CHORUS Then up with your feet and away to go. Off, off to the supper we’ll run. With a whoop for the prize, hurrah, hurrah, With a whoop for the prize, hurrah, hurrah, Whoop, whoop, for the victory won!
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