Τίμων ἰδοὺ τρίτος οὗτος ὁ ῥήτωρ Δημέας προσέρχεται ψήφισμα ἔχων ἐν τῇ δεξιᾷ καὶ συγγενὴς ἡμέτερος εἶναι λέγων. οὗτος ἑκκαίδεκα παρʼ ἐμοῦ τάλαντα μιᾶς ἡμέρας ἐκτίσας τῇ πόλει — καταδεδίκαστο γὰρ καὶ ἐδέδετο οὐκ ἀποδιδούς, κἀγὼ ἐλεήσας ἐλυσάμην αὐτόν — ἐπειδὴ πρῴην ἔλαχε τῇ Ἐρεχθηΐδι φυλῇ διανέμειν τὸ θεωρικὸν κἀγὼ προσῆλθον αἰτῶν τὸ γινόμενον, οὐκ ἔφη γνωρίζειν πολίτην ὄντα με.
Δημέας χαῖρε, ὦ Τίμων, τὸ μέγα ὄφελος τοῦ γένους, τὸ ἔρεισμα τῶν Ἀθηνῶν, τὸ πρόβλημα τῆς Ἑλλάδος· καὶ μὴν πάλαι σε ὁ δῆμος συνειλεγμένος καὶ αἱ βουλαὶ ἀμφότεραι περιμένουσι. πρότερον δὲ ἄκουσον τὸ ψήφισμα, ὃ ὑπὲρ σοῦ γέγραφα·
ἐπειδὴ Τίμων Ἐχεκρατίδου Κολλυτεύς, ἀνὴρ οὐ μόνον καλὸς κἀγαθός, ἀλλὰ καὶ σοφὸς ὡς οὐκ ἄλλος ἐν τῇ Ἑλλάδι, παρὰ πάντα χρόνον διατελεῖ τὰ ἄριστα πράττων τῇ πόλει, νενίκηκε δὲ πὺξ καὶ πάλην καὶ δρόμον ἐν Ὀλυμπίᾳ μιᾶς ἡμέρας καὶ τελείῳ ἅρματι καὶ συνωρίδι πωλικῇ —
Τίμων ἀλλʼ οὐδὲ ἐθεώρησα ἐγὼ πώποτε εἰς Ὀλυμπίαν.
Δημέας τί οὖν; θεωρήσεις ὕστερον· τὰ τοιαῦτα δὲ πολλὰ προσκεῖσθαι ἄμεινον. καὶ ἠρίστευσε δὲ ὑπὲρ τῆς πόλεως πέρυσι πρὸς Ἀχαρναῖς καὶ κατέκοψε Πελοποννησίων δύο μόρας —
TIMON Now for number three. Lawyer Demeas—my cousin, as he calls himself, with a decree in his hand. Between three and four thousand it was that I paid in to the Treasury in ready money for him; he had been fined that amount and imprisoned in default, and I took pity on him. Well, the other day he was distributing-officer of the festival money ; when I applied for my share, he pretended I was not a citizen.
DEMEAS Hail, Timon, ornament of our race, pillar of Athens, shield of Hellas! The Assembly and both Councils are met, and expect your appearance. But first hear the decree which I have proposed in your honour. ‘WHEREAS Timon son of Echecratides of Collytus who adds to high position and character a sagacity unmatched in Greece is a consistent and indefatigable promoter of his country’s good and Whereas he has been victorious at Olympia on one day in boxing wrestling and running as well as in the two and the four-horse chariot races—’
TIMON Why, I was never so much as a spectator at Olympia.
DEMEAS What does that matter? you will be some day. It looks better to have a good deal of that sort in—‘and Whereas he fought with distinction last year at Acharnae cutting two Peloponnesian companies to pieces—’
Τίμων πῶς; διὰ γὰρ τὸ μὴ ἔχειν ὅπλα οὐδὲ προὐγράφην ἐν τῷ καταλόγῳ.
Δημέας μέτρια τὰ περὶ σαυτοῦ λέγεις, ἡμεῖς δὲ ἀχάριστοι ἂν εἴημεν ἀμνημονοῦντες. ἔτι δὲ καὶ ψηφίσματα γράφων καὶ συμβουλεύων καὶ στρατηγῶν οὐ μικρὰ ὠφέλησε τὴν πόλιν· ἐπὶ τούτοις ἅπασι δεδόχθω τῇ βουλῇ καὶ τῷ δήμῳ καὶ τῇ Ἡλιαίᾳ καὶ ταῖς φυλαῖς καὶ τοῖς δήμοις ἰδίᾳ καὶ κοινῇ πᾶσι χρυσοῦν ἀναστῆσαι τὸν Τίμωνα παρὰ τὴν Ἀθηνᾶν ἐν τῇ ἀκροπόλει κεραυνὸν ἐν τῇ δεξιᾷ ἔχοντα καὶ ἀκτῖνας ἐπὶ τῇ κεφαλῇ καὶ στεφανῶσαι αὐτὸν χρυσοῖς στεφάνοις ἑπτὰ καὶ ἀνακηρυχθῆναι τοὺς στεφάνους τήμερον Διονυσίοις τραγῳδοῖς καινοῖς — ἀχθῆναι γὰρ διʼ αὐτὸν δεῖ τήμερον τὰ Διονύσια. εἶπε τὴν γνώμην Δημέας ὁ ῥήτωρ, συγγενὴς αὐτοῦ ἀγχιστεὺς καὶ μαθητὴς ὤν· καὶ γὰρ ῥήτωρ ἄριστος ὁ Τίμων καὶ τὰ ἄλλα πάντα ὁπόσα ἂν ἐθέλῃ.
Δημέας τουτὶ μὲν οὖν σοι τὸ ψήφισμα. ἐγὼ δὲ καὶ τὸν υἱὸν ἐβουλόμην ἀγαγεῖν παρὰ σέ, ὃν ἐπὶ τῷ σῷ ὀνόματι Τίμωνα ὠνόμακα.
Τίμων πῶς, ὦ Δημέα, ὃς οὐδὲ γεγάμηκας, ὅσα γε καὶ ἡμᾶς εἰδέναι;
Δημέας ἀλλὰ γαμῶ, ἢν διδῷ θεός, ἐς νέωτα καὶ παιδοποιήσομαι καὶ τὸ γεννηθησόμενον — ἄρρεν γὰρ ἔσται — Τίμωνα ἤδη καλῶ.
Τίμων οὐκ οἶδα εἰ γαμησείεις ἔτι, ὦ οὗτος, τηλικαύτην παρʼ ἐμοῦ πληγὴν λαμβάνων.
Δημέας οἴμοι· τί τοῦτο; τυραννίδι Τίμων ἐπιχειρεῖς καὶ τύπτεις τοὺς ἐλευθέρους οὐ καθαρῶς ἐλεύθερος οὐδʼ αὐτὸς ὤν; ἀλλὰ δώσεις ἐν τάχει τὴν δίκην τά τε ἄλλα καὶ ὅτι τὴν ἀκρόπολιν ἐνέπρησας.
Τίμων ἀλλʼ οὐκ ἐμπέπρησται, ὦ μιαρέ, ἡ ἀκρόπολις· ὥστε δῆλος εἶ συκοφαντῶν.
Δημέας ἀλλὰ καὶ πλουτεῖς τὸν ὀπισθόδομον διορύξας.
Τίμων οὐ διώρυκται οὐδὲ οὗτος, ὥστε ἀπίθανά σου καὶ ταῦτα.
Δημέας διορυχθήσεται μὲν ὕστερον· ἤδη δὲ σὺ πάντα τὰ ἐν αὐτῷ ἔχεις.
Τίμων οὐκοῦν καὶ ἄλλην λάμβανε.
Δημέας οἴμοι τὸ μετάφρενον.
Τίμων μὴ κέκραχθι· κατοίσω γάρ σοι καὶ τρίτην· ἐπεὶ καὶ γελοῖα πάμπαν ἂν πάθοιμι δύο μὲν Λακεδαιμονίων μόρας κατακόψας ἄνοπλος, ἓν δὲ μιαρὸν ἀνθρώπιον μὴ ἐπιτρίψας· μάτην γὰρ ἂν εἴην καὶ νενικηκὼς Ὀλύμπια πὺξ καὶ πάλην.
TIMON Good work that, considering that my name was not on the muster-rolls, because I could not afford a suit of armour.
DEMEAS Ah, you are modest; but it would be ingratitude in us to forget your services—‘and Whereas by political measures and responsible advice and military action he has conferred great benefits on his country Now for all these reasons it is the pleasure of the Assembly and the Council the ten divisions of the High Court and the Borough Councils individually and collectively THAT a golden statue of the said Timon be placed on the Acropolis alongside of Athene with a thunderbolt in the hand and a seven-rayed aureole on the head Further that golden garlands be conferred on him and proclaimed this day at the New Tragedies the said day being kept in his honour as the Dionysia. Mover of the Decree Demeas the pleader the said Timon’s near relation and disciple the said Timon being as distinguished in pleading as in all else wherein it pleases him to excel.’
So runs the decree. I had designed also to present to you my son, whom I have named Timon after you.
TIMON Why, I thought you were a bachelor, Demeas.
DEMEAS Ah, but I intend to marry next year; my child—which is to be a boy—I hereby name Timon.
TIMON I doubt whether you will feel like marrying, my man, when I have given you—this!
DEMEAS Oh Lord! what is that for? … You are plotting a coup d’etat, you Timon; you assault free men, and you are neither a free man nor a citizen yourself. You shall soon be called to account for your crimes; it was you set fire to the Acropolis, for one thing.
TIMON Why, you scoundrel, the Acropolis has not been set on fire; you are a common blackmailer.
DEMEAS You got your gold by breaking into the Treasury.
TIMON It has not been broken into, either; you are not even plausible.
DEMEAS There is time for the burglary yet; meantime, you are in possession of the treasures.
TIMON Well, here is another for you, anyhow.
DEMEAS Oh! oh! my back!
Τίμων ἀλλὰ τί τοῦτο; οὐ Θρασυκλῆς ὁ φιλόσοφος οὗτός ἐστιν; οὐ μὲν οὖν ἄλλος· ἐκπετάσας γοῦν τὸν πώγωνα καὶ τὰς ὀφρῦς ἀνατείνας καὶ βρενθυόμενός τι πρὸς αὑτὸν ἔρχεται, τιτανῶδες βλέπων, ἀνασεσοβημένος τὴν ἐπὶ τῷ μετώπῳ κόμην, Αὐτοβορέας τις ἢ Τρίτων, οἵους ὁ Ζεῦξις ἔγραψεν. οὗτος ὁ τὸ σχῆμα εὐσταλὴς καὶ κόσμιος τὸ βάδισμα καὶ σωφρονικὸς τὴν ἀναβολὴν ἕωθεν μυρία ὅσα περὶ ἀρετῆς διεξιὼν καὶ τῶν ἡδονῇ χαιρόντων κατηγορῶν καὶ τὸ ὀλιγαρκὲς ἐπαινῶν, ἐπειδὴ λουσάμενος ἀφίκοιτο ἐπὶ τὸ δεῖπνον καὶ ὁ παῖς μεγάλην τὴν κύλικα ὀρέξειεν αὐτῷ — τῷ ζωροτέρῳ δὲ χαίρει μάλιστα — καθάπερ τὸ Λήθης ὕδωρ ἐκπιὼν ἐναντιώτατα ἐπιδείκνυται τοῖς ἑωθινοῖς ἐκείνοις λόγοις, προαρπάζων ὥσπερ ἴκτινος τὰ ὄψα καὶ τὸν πλησίον παραγκωνιζόμενος, καρύκης τὸ γένειον ἀνάπλεως, κυνηδὸν ἐμφορούμενος, ἐπικεκυφὼς καθάπερ ἐν ταῖς λοπάσι τὴν ἀρετὴν εὑρήσειν προσδοκῶν, ἀκριβῶς τὰ τρύβλια τῷ λιχανῷ ἀποσμήχων ὡς μηδὲ ὀλίγον τοῦ μυττωτοῦ καταλίποι,
Τίμων μεμψίμοιρος ἀεί, κἂν τὸν πλακοῦντα ὅλον ἢ τὸν σῦν μόνος τῶν ἄλλων λάβῃ, ὅ τι περ λιχνείας καὶ ἀπληστίας ὄφελος, μέθυσος καὶ πάροινος οὐκ ἄχρι ᾠδῆς καὶ ὀρχηστύος μόνον, ἀλλὰ καὶ λοιδορίας καὶ ὀργῆς. προσέτι καὶ λόγοι πολλοὶ ἐπὶ τῇ κύλικι, τότε δὴ καὶ μάλιστα, περὶ σωφροσύνης καὶ κοσμιότητος· καὶ ταῦτά φησιν ἤδη ὑπὸ τοῦ ἀκράτου πονήρως ἔχων καὶ ὑποτραυλίζων γελοίως· εἶτα ἔμετος ἐπὶ τούτοις· καὶ τὸ τελευταῖον, ἀράμενοί τινες ἐκφέρουσιν αὐτὸν ἐκ τοῦ συμποσίου τῆς αὐλητρίδος ἀμφοτέραις ἐπειλημμένον. πλὴν ἀλλὰ καὶ νήφων οὐδενὶ τῶν πρωτείων παραχωρήσειεν ἂν ψεύσματος ἕνεκα ἢ θρασύτητος ἢ φιλαργυρίας· ἀλλὰ καὶ κολάκων ἐστὶ τὰ πρῶτα καὶ ἐπιορκεῖ προχειρότατα, καὶ ἡ γοητεία προηγεῖται καὶ ἡ ἀναισχυντία παρομαρτεῖ, καὶ ὅλως πάνσοφόν τι χρῆμα καὶ πανταχόθεν ἀκριβὲς καὶ ποικίλως ἐντελές. οἰμώξεται τοιγαροῦν οὐκ εἰς μακρὰν χρηστὸς ὤν. τί τοῦτο; παπαί, χρόνιος ἡμῖν Θρασυκλῆς.
TIMON Don’t make such a noise, if you don’t want a third. It would be too absurd, you know, if I could cut two companies of Spartans to pieces without my armour, and not be able to give a single little scoundrel his deserts. My Olympic boxing and wrestling victories would be thrown away.
Whom have we now? is this Thrasycles the philosopher? sure enough it is. A halo of beard, eyebrows an inch above their place, superiority in his air, a look that might storm heaven, locks waving to the wind—‘tis a very Boreas or Triton from Zeuxis’ pencil. This hero of the careful get-up, the solemn gait, the plain attire—in the morning he will utter a thousand maxims, expounding Virtue, arraigning self- indulgence, lauding simplicity; and then, when he gets to dinner after his bath, his servant fills him a bumper (he prefers it neat), and draining this Lethe-draught he proceeds to turn his morning maxima inside out; he swoops like a hawk on dainty dishes, elbows his neighbour aside, fouls his beard with trickling sauce, laps like a dog, with his nose in his plate, as if he expected to find Virtue there, and runs his finger all round the bowl, not to lose a drop of the gravy. Let him monopolize pastry or joint, he will still criticize the carving—that is all the satisfaction his ravenous greed brings him—; when the wine is in, singing and dancing are delights not fierce enough; he must brawl and rave. He has plenty to say in his cups—he is then at his best in that kind—upon temperance and decorum; he is full of these when his potations have reduced him to ridiculous stuttering. Next the wine disagrees with him, and at last he is carried out of the room, holding on with all his might to the flute-girl. Take him sober, for that matter, and you will hardly find his match at lying, effrontery or avarice. He is facile princeps of flatterers, perjury sits on his tongue-tip, imposture goes before him, and shamelessness is his good comrade; oh, he is a most ingenious piece of work, finished at all points, a multum in parvo. I am afraid his kind heart will be grieved presently. Why, how is this, Thrasycles? I must say, you have taken your time about coming.
Θρασυκλῆς οὐ κατὰ ταὐτά, ὦ Τίμων, τοῖς πολλοῖς τούτοις ἀφῖγμαι, οἵπερ τὸν πλοῦτόν σου τεθηπότες ἀργυρίου καὶ χρυσίου καὶ δείπνων πολυτελῶν ἐλπίδι συνδεδραμήκασι, πολλὴν τὴν κολακείαν ἐπιδειξόμενοι πρὸς ἄνδρα οἷον σὲ ἁπλοϊκὸν καὶ τῶν ὄντων κοινωνικόν· οἶσθα γὰρ ὡς μᾶζα μὲν ἐμοὶ δεῖπνον ἱκανόν, ὄψον δὲ ἥδιστον θύμον ἢ κάρδαμον ἢ εἴ ποτε τρυφῴην, ὀλίγον τῶν ἁλῶν· ποτὸν δὲ ἡ ἐννεάκρουνος· ὁ δὲ τρίβων οὗτος ἧς βούλει πορφυρίδος ἀμείνων. τὸ χρυσίον μὲν γὰρ οὐδὲν τιμιώτερον τῶν ἐν τοῖς αἰγιαλοῖς ψηφίδων μοι δοκεῖ. σοῦ δὲ αὐτοῦ χάριν ἐστάλην, ὡς μὴ διαφθείρῃ σε τὸ κάκιστον τοῦτο καὶ ἐπιβουλότατον κτῆμα ὁ πλοῦτος, ὁ πολλοῖς πολλάκις αἴτιος ἀνηκέστων συμφορῶν γεγενημένος· εἰ γάρ μοι πείθοιο, μάλιστα μὲν ὅλον ἐς τὴν θάλατταν ἐμβαλεῖς αὐτὸν οὐδὲν ἀναγκαῖον ἀνδρὶ ἀγαθῷ ὄντα καὶ τὸν φιλοσοφίας πλοῦτον ὁρᾶν δυναμένῳ· μὴ μέντοι ἐς βάθος, ὦγαθέ, ἀλλʼ ὅσον ἐς βουβῶνας ἐπεμβὰς ὀλίγον πρὸ τῆς κυματωγῆς, ἐμοῦ ὁρῶντος μόνου·
Θρασυκλῆς εἰ δὲ μὴ τοῦτο βούλει, σὺ δὲ ἄλλον τρόπον ἀμείνω κατὰ τάχος ἐκφόρησον αὐτὸν ἐκ τῆς οἰκίας μηδʼ ὀβολὸν αὑτῷ ἀνείς, διαδιδοὺς ἅπασι τοῖς δεομένοις, ᾧ μὲν πέντε δραχμάς, ᾧ δὲ μνᾶν, ᾧ δὲ ἡμιτάλαντον· εἰ δέ τις φιλόσοφος εἴη, διμοιρίαν ἢ τριμοιρίαν φέρεσθαι δίκαιος· ἐμοὶ δέ — καίτοι οὐκ ἐμαυτοῦ χάριν αἰτῶ, ἀλλʼ ὅπως μεταδῶ τῶν ἑταίρων τοῖς δεομένοις — ἱκανὸν εἰ ταυτηνὶ τὴν πήραν ἐμπλήσας παράσχοις οὐδὲ ὅλους δύο μεδίμνους χωροῦσαν Αἰγινητικούς. ὀλιγαρκῆ δὲ καὶ μέτριον χρὴ εἶναι τὸν φιλοσοφοῦντα καὶ μηδὲν ὑπὲρ τὴν πήραν φρονεῖν.
Τίμων ἐπαινῶ ταῦτά σου, ὦ Θρασύκλεις· πρὸ δʼ οὖν τῆς πήρας, εἰ δοκεῖ, φέρε σοι τὴν κεφαλὴν ἐμπλήσω κονδύλων ἐπιμετρήσας τῇ δικέλλῃ.
Θρασυκλῆς ὦ δημοκρατία καὶ νόμοι, παιόμεθα ὑπὸ τοῦ καταράτου ἐν ἐλευθέρᾳ τῇ πόλει.
Τίμων τί ἀγανακτεῖς, ὦγαθέ; μῶν παρακέκρουσμαί σε; καὶ μὴν ἐπεμβαλῶ χοίνικας ὑπὲρ τὸ μέτρον τέτταρας.
Τίμων ἀλλὰ τί τοῦτο; πολλοὶ συνέρχονται· Βλεψίας ἐκεῖνος καὶ Λάχης καὶ Γνίφων καὶ ὅλον τὸ σύνταγμα τῶν οἰμωξομένων. ὥστε τί οὐκ ἐπὶ τὴν πέτραν ταύτην ἀνελθὼν τὴν μὲν δίκελλαν ὀλίγον ἀναπαύω πάλαι πεπονηκυῖαν, αὐτὸς δὲ ὅτι πλείστους λίθους συμφορήσας ἐπιχαλαζῶ πόρρωθεν αὐτούς;
Βλεψίας μὴ βάλλε, ὦ Τίμων· ἄπιμεν γάρ.
Τίμων ἀλλʼ οὐκ ἀναιμωτί γε ὑμεῖς οὐδὲ ἄνευ τραυμάτων.
THRASYCLES Ah, Timon, I am not come like the rest of the crowd; they are dazzled by your wealth; they are gathered together with an eye to gold and silver and high living; they will soon be showing their servile tricks before your unsuspicious, generous self. As for me, you know a crust is all the dinner I care for; the relish I like best is a bit of thyme or cress; on festal days I may go as far as a sprinkling of salt. My drink is the crystal spring; and this threadbare cloak is better than your gay robes. Gold—I value it no higher than pebbles on the beach. What brought me was concern for you; I would not have you ruined by this same pestilent wealth, this temptation for plunderers; many is the man it has sunk in helpless misery. Take my advice, and fling it bodily into the sea; a good man, to whom the wealth of philosophy is revealed, has no need of the other. It does not matter about deep water, my good sir; wade in up to your waist when the tide is near flood, and let no one see you but me. Or if that is not satisfactory, here is another plan even better. Get it all out of the house as quick as you can, not reserving a penny for yourself, and distribute it to the poor five shillings to one, five pounds to another, a hundred to a third; philosophy might constitute a claim to a double or triple share. For my part—and I do not ask for myself, only to divide it among my needy friends—I should be quite content with as much as my scrip would hold; it is something short of two standard bushels; if one professes philosophy, one must be moderate and have few needs—none that go beyond the capacity of a scrip.
TIMON Very right, Thrasycles. But instead of a mere scripful, pray take a whole headful of clouts, standard measure by the spade.
THRASYCLES Land of liberty, equality, legality! protect me against this ruffian!
TIMON What is your grievance, my good man? is the measure short? here is a pint or two extra, then, to put it right.
Why, what now? here comes a crowd; friend Blepsias, Laches, Gniphon; their name is legion; they shall howl soon. I had better get up on the rock; my poor tired spade wants a little rest; I will collect all the stones I can lay hands on, and pepper them at long range.
BLEPSIAS Don’t throw, Timon; we are going.
TIMON Whether the retreat will be bloodless, however, is another question.
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