ROC And Pan Picture

"I have a story to tell, a true story and a fairy story." I came to Findhorn with a certain skepticism many years ago. I came with a group of artist friends who were guided to come here and create studios. We learned about Findhorn through a scurrilous article in a Swedish tabloidfrom my hometown in Stockholm. I discovered the reality here and was a bit put off by all the talk of angels and devas, that is, before I met ROC (Robert Ogilvie Crombie) and Dorothy!

I began to have my own experiences and these started intruding on my life. I felt fingers touching my face, lovely aromas assaulted me and strong presences impinged upon me. I was increasingly experiencing the realms that ROC had been describing.

ROC invited me to come to Edinburgh for the weekend, where he had some business to do for Findhorn pottery. I had my "Real" initiation there. ROC told me to go to the Royal Botanical Gardens. There I experienced the energy of ley lines. Later that day, as we were walking near the Royal Art Gallery, I experienced, as an image in my mind, the figure of Pan standing nearby. After that, whenever there was a need, Pan would initiate a "seeing."

After that experience, ROC and I went to the Hermitage at Brae, southwest of Edinburgh. In the 18th century it was a custom among the gentry to hire a student to be their "hermit" for a year to live in the Hermitage whilst continuing their studies. There is a ravine on the property with a brook running through it. It is an incredibly beautiful place. That day, I suddenly had my crown chakra open up and soon after we entered the gardens of the Hermitage. I felt disconnected from my legs, almost drunk.

As we walked, I realised that we were accompanied by many beings, dressed in russet and gold, in medieval dress. It took me some time to pluck up the courage to tell ROC what I was seeing. ROC said, yes, these beings were High Elves. ROC and I and the elves walked together companionably for awhile. Then we stopped and all the elves, but one, went away. ROC said that this elf was going back with me to Findhorn. The elf joined me on the bus! When I arrived home, my caravan-mate, Christian, noticed the elf's presence and commented on it. I learned that the elf was sent here for more than just the gardens. He is here to oversee the guardianship of sacred spaces. The elf accepted the name Merlando from our garden team and attended our meetings and assisted us whenever possible.

I left Findhorn full of doubts and insecurities, as I tried to reconcile what I was experiencing with my traditional Catholic upbringing. I was away from the Findhorn community for quite a few years. When I came back to visit, much of the magic had disappeared. In 1993, Magda Thompson and Peter Caddy I were together at Randolph's Leap on the Findhorn River. There we all connected to Pan and a particular tree. Pan thanked Peter for his work. Peter asked Pan what his next step would be. Pan was evasive. A few months later, Peter died in an accident in Germany. Then, I was able to see Merlando again and knew that Merlando was still very present . Marijke, the garden focaliser at the time, had a deep experience of light and joy emanating from the wildflower garden, felt a being on her shoulder, and a beckoning sensation. Others since have had similar experiences, assurances that the fairies and elves are here to work with us, if only we take the time to tune in to their world
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